How To Achieve Your Goals

In controlling behavior it is usually necessary to know exactly what motivates people to misbehave. Many people will always attribute a behavior to attention seeking. But this is only one out of an array of motivations.

Attention:

Sometimes people are motivated by attention. This is especially true of clients in mental institutions, politicians and people involved in the media industry.

Solution to attention-seeking:

In order to solve the behavior problem it may be necessary to render more attention to an individual than would ordinarily be expected. In rare cases, it may even be necessary to give an individual non-contingent attention in order to squelch the abnormal behavior. In some cases individuals may transcend their craving for attention by reflecting on what benefit they have received as a result of attention. Politicians sometimes realize that attention can carry with it just as many negatives as positives.

Terminate Ignore:

There are some who simply seek to terminate the period of time in which they are being ignored. These are similar to people who crave attention except they are generally satisfied if they become the focus of attention for only a short time. Many wives are in this situation, feeling their husbands have generally ignored them. Many employees are in this situation, feeling their boss ignores them except when something goes wrong.

Solution to terminate ignore:

Sometimes simple recognition, even momentary, may be the solution. It only takes a short time to let someone know that you appreciate them. Very few people will express a dislike for being appreciated.

Task Avoidance:

Many times people will exhibit behavior problems when they are seeking to avoid a task. A husband or wife may start screaming at their partner when a subject is brought up that they do not want to discuss. Children sometime run away from home to avoid a trip to the dentist or therapist.

Solution to task avoidance:

Sometimes you can practice successive approximation, taking gradual steps toward the goal before reaching the target behavior.

Tangibles Acquisition:

This is a usual situation in which an object (toy, candy, food, car, money, house, etc.) is desired but not obtained. Sometimes the result is a temper fit or temper tantrum.

Solution to tangibles acquisition:

Generally, a behavior contract can be implemented. A desired toy, for example, can be earned by one week of good behavior and doing designated tasks each day without fail.

Physical Sensation:

People participating in sexual crimes have physical sensation as their motive. People who use drugs to alter what their mind and body experience have as their motivation physical sensation. Sky-divers and amusement park riders have physical sensation as their motivation.

Solution to physical sensation:

Generally the solution is to discover acceptable safe ways to enjoy physical sensation, without the endangering of life and limb.

Escape:

Many people have escape as their motivation. Runaways, in many cases, just want to get away from their families and the situation that they have had to endure.

Solution to escape:

There are several solutions. Enhance the environment to a reinforcer-rich environment. Make home a good place to be, a place to enjoy. In the case of runaways, take more vacations and travel more extensively.

Compliance Tug-Of-War:

Some people enjoy a battle of any kind. Some employees, for example, enjoy pushing against their boss on various issues. Some hospital patients enjoy resisting treatment and seeing the reaction of the staff.

Solution to compliance tug-of-war:

One solution is to pass the word that no one is to react strongly to the person trying to get a tug-of-war started. This only works if everyone involved is consistent in participating.

More information is at behavior control. One principal in behavior is that honey works better than vinegar. This is true and exemplifies the fact that positive behavior techniques should take priority. On the other hand, ruling out punishers is also a mistake. The best balance is having an environment in which misbehavior becomes the exception to the rule.

Catch people being good and reward them!

More information?

Go to behavior motivation.

P.S. Also take into account the advantages which EFT (emotional freedom therapy) is giving people and how it helps to set one on the road of self empowerment.